Your engagement party marks the beginning of a truly exciting chapter in your wedding planning journey.
This celebration is your chance to share your joyous news with family and friends, setting the tone for all the festivities to come. Let’s walk through the 8 essential steps to planning an incredible engagement party.
I’m Nazlee, the Director of Offley Place, an award-winning wedding venue where we’ve had the pleasure of hosting countless beautiful weddings over the years. Having recently tied the knot myself, I’m excited to share insider tips and tricks from both sides of the aisle to help you craft the perfect curated wedding. You can find me on YouTube and Instagram for even more wedding prep tips.
Today, we’re focusing on everything engagement party-related, from A to Z. This party is a fantastic way to celebrate your new chapter and for your inner circles to connect before the wedding. If you have a longer engagement, it’s an extra-special occasion to look forward to while you wait for the big day.
Decide who is hosting
Choosing who will host your engagement party is the first step in setting the tone for the entire event. Traditionally, the bride’s parents host the engagement party, but the reality is that anyone can take on this role. Whether you decide to host it yourselves, have a family member lead, or entrust a close friend with the task, this decision will shape the overall dynamic of the celebration.
Hosting your own engagement party gives you the creative freedom to shape every detail to match your vision. From selecting the venue to choosing decorations, you can tailor everything to reflect your unique style as a couple. However, this also means taking on the full responsibility of event planning, which might be a lot depending on your preferences.
Alternatively, having family or friends host the party can relieve some of the stress. They often have a good sense of your tastes and preferences, making it easier to plan an event that you'll love. It can also be a meaningful way for them to be involved in your celebration.
You might also consider working with a professional event planner. Ensure they understand your vision and the atmosphere you want for the day. Many wedding planners offer engagement party planning services and can make the process seamless. This could even be a great way to test if you'd like to work with the same planner for your wedding.
Ultimately, the choice is entirely up to you. Personally, I would want to be involved in planning my own engagement party to ensure it reflects my vision. However, if someone close to you is eager to take charge and you trust their judgement, feel free to let them take the reins.
Whether you choose to plan it yourself or delegate the task, the goal remains the same: creating a celebration that beautifully reflects your love and excitement with your loved ones.
Choose a venue
Choosing your venue is a crucial next step as it will set the tone for your engagement party, influencing its formality and ambiance. Whether you envision a relaxed gathering at home or a more formal affair at a restaurant or event venue, this decision will help determine the overall atmosphere and style of your celebration.
If you're aiming for a more elegant or formal event, a rented venue might be the ideal choice. On the other hand, if a casual, laid-back vibe is more your style, hosting at home — perhaps in a garden — creates a relaxed atmosphere where guests can mingle freely.
Consider the venue’s size and availability, especially if you have a specific date in mind. Think about the type of food you want to serve and what you envision your guests wearing. These details will help guide your choice.
For our engagement party, we wanted a blend of elegance and casual comfort. We opted for a gorgeous yurt set up in my parents' back garden. It struck the perfect balance for us, offering a unique and special setting while maintaining a homey feel. Hosting at my parents' house was really meaningful for us. It’s where I grew up, where our parents met, and it’s the centre of our family gatherings. It made the event feel even more special.
Hosting a larger party at home does come with its challenges. There’s a lot to manage, from timing and decor to food, drinks, serving staff, and even parking arrangements. If you’re using external caterers, they’ll need somewhere to set up as well. While it’s certainly doable, be prepared for the workload. Opting for an external venue can simplify things significantly, as the venue staff can assist with many of these details, including decor, set up and clear down and the food and drinks will already be onsite.Â
The day before and the morning after our party involved a considerable amount of setup and cleanup. While I was delighted with how everything turned out, it would have been much easier if we’d chosen a different location. Keep this in mind when making your decision. Whether at home or an external venue, your choice should align with your vision and comfort level for the event.
Choose a Date
Choosing the right date for your engagement party is key to ensuring your loved ones can join in the celebration and have a fantastic time. Ideally, aim to host your party within the first few months of your engagement, while the excitement is still fresh. However, there’s no need to rush. It's perfectly fine to take some time to enjoy the moment privately before sharing it with others.
Consider the schedules of both you and your partner, as well as those of close friends and family. Timing is especially important if you have loved ones travelling from abroad or if certain seasons are busier for others.
For example, we got engaged in June and held our engagement party in September. This timing allowed us to savour the excitement privately and also accommodated our families, some of whom were travelling from abroad. Plus, it worked better for me as summer is my busiest time at work.
If you’re using an external venue, check their availability early, as this can impact your date options. Ideally, planning 2-3 months after the proposal is the sweet spot. It gives you enough time to enjoy the engagement and organise the event. However, if you’re planning a longer engagement, you might choose to wait even longer. The key is to celebrate on a timeline that feels right for you.
Create the Guest List
Creating the guest list for your engagement party is a pivotal step that will shape the tone and atmosphere of your celebration. Whether you’re handling the planning yourself or someone else is in charge, carefully selecting your closest friends, family members, and loved ones is essential.
A crucial point to remember: anyone invited to your engagement party should also receive an invitation to the wedding. If you’re unsure about inviting someone to the wedding, it’s best to leave them off the engagement party guest list. Inviting someone to the engagement party often sets an expectation that they will be invited to the wedding too, so this helps avoid misunderstandings or hurt feelings. You can always extend a wedding invitation to someone who wasn’t at the engagement party further down the line, but doing the reverse can be more complicated.
If you’re planning the engagement party yourself, you’ll have full control over the guest list, ensuring consistency with your wedding invitations. By thoughtfully curating your guest list, you’ll create a celebration that feels intimate and special, surrounded by those who truly matter to you.
Plan the Menu
Choosing the menu for your engagement party is crucial because, while your guests may not remember every detail, the food is something they will definitely recall!
Consider the style and ambiance of your event when planning the menu. For a relaxed gathering, opt for a casual menu with sharing boards, finger foods, and self-serve drinks. This creates a laid-back atmosphere where guests can mingle comfortably and enjoy the event without formality.
If you’re aiming for a more sophisticated celebration, working with a caterer to provide canapés or bowl food adds an elegant touch while still allowing guests to move around and socialise. This was the approach we took at our engagement party—our catering team served canapés and bowl food throughout the evening, and it was a hit with everyone!
For a formal sit-down meal, expect more organisation. You’ll need a waiting team, chefs, and should also ask your guests for any dietary restrictions or preferences to ensure everyone is catered to.
Ultimately, the food you choose will set the tone for your event, reflecting your style as a couple and ensuring you leave your guests with the best memories.
Send Invitations
Now that you’ve nailed down the venue, date, guest list, and menu, it’s time to start inviting your guests. This is when you get to share your excitement and ensure everyone has all the details they need!
The type of invitation you choose should match the style and tone of your engagement party. For a more formal event or a seated dinner, traditional paper invitations add a touch of elegance and provide space for essential details, including food choices. For a casual gathering, digital invitations via text or email are a convenient and effective option, conveying all the necessary information quickly.
For our engagement party, we opted for a text invitation, which worked perfectly for us. I designed it myself on Canva, which made sending it out a breeze and allowed for immediate responses and any questions from guests.
What should you include in your invitations? Here’s a checklist:
- Date, Time, and Location: Make sure these are clearly stated.
- Special Instructions or Requests: If the venue is tricky to access or there are other important details, include those.
- Outdoor/Indoor Information: If it’s a garden party or an outdoor event, let your guests know so they can dress appropriately.
- RSVP Deadline: Set a clear deadline for responses. Ideally 1-2 weeks from sending the invitation. Allow a bit of buffer time for late replies.
- Dress Code: This is crucial! I learned this the hard way. Without a dress code, I received numerous queries from guests about what to wear. Including a dress code helps guests feel comfortable and appropriately dressed.
Set the Scene
Setting the scene for your engagement party is all about transforming your venue into a space that reflects both of your personalities and your love story. Whether you prefer a simple or extravagant approach, the goal is to create an inviting and joyful atmosphere that feels authentically you.
Start with Your Colour Scheme: Choose a colour palette that resonates with your style and use it throughout your decor for a cohesive look.
Enhance the Ambiance: Add elements like flowers, candles, and string lights to bring warmth and elegance to the venue. These touches create a beautiful backdrop for your celebration.
Playful and Elegant Decor: Depending on your style, you might use balloons and streamers for a fun, festive vibe. For something more refined, consider simple, elegant decorations.
For our engagement party, we worked with a stylist who decorated our yurt with white bunting and paper lanterns. It was simple yet effective, making the space feel both playful and elegant. Don’t underestimate how impactful a bit of decor can be!
Personal Touches: Incorporating photos or mementos from your relationship adds a special, intimate feel to the event. We displayed photos on an antique mirror, and it was a big hit with our guests.
Ultimately, whether you opt for a neutral colour palette or vibrant hues, the key is to infuse the space with elements that reflect your unique style as a couple and set the stage for a memorable engagement party.
Choose an Outfit
Choosing the right outfit for your engagement party is a crucial final touch to planning your celebration. It’s important to select something that complements the formality and ambiance of your venue while ensuring you stand out as the VIP of the evening.
For Brides-to-Be a white dress is a classic choice that signifies your role as the bride. Opt for something playful and distinct from your wedding dress to avoid feeling like you're in full wedding attire too soon. For instance, I wore a mini blazer dress with an origami-style touch, which felt both special and comfortable.
If you prefer to save the white dress for the wedding or if you’re drawn to colour, go for floral patterns, soft pastels, or a bit of sparkle, especially for an evening celebration. Aim for a balance between elegance and casualness. This approach can be tricky but is my favourite way to dress for such events.
Don’t stress too much about what your guests are wearing. It’s perfectly fine to be slightly overdressed compared to them. Your outfit should reflect your personal style and fit the occasion.
If purchasing online, order well in advance to avoid last-minute stress. Consider potential shipping delays, returns, exchanges, and alterations. And remember to choose comfortable shoes—no one wants to be uncomfortable at their own party!
Ultimately, select an outfit that makes you feel confident, special, and ready to enjoy your engagement party with your loved ones.
Check out these ultimate wedding trends that you're going to want to know about for the next stage, and if you're planning your engagement shoot - you'll find everything you need to know here.Â
Download our free engagement party planning guide here - so you don't miss a thing!
